If missing is an apt equivalent upshot of
becoming extinct for a couple of months, then i am culpable of such. I missed
blogging. There was nought quantity of thrill in inscribing words in the pad.
The thoughts just came, shook my peripheral for seconds, and off they went to
the sewer and be totally forgotten in wasteland that is my brain. The pains of
writing, haha! Tell me more about it. So just please allow my poor brain to simply
throw you a throwback. :D ( I’m not
making any sense right here, right? )
Had 5 lovely kittens before. I nursed them under my bed so that father won’t notice
them. And did I mention i had an atrocious allergy on fur, dust, pollen, and almost
all minute organisms that are capable of infiltrating into my respiratory
track? Well, you guess that right. I Had asthma, the worst case of it actually.
Upon discovering those lovely, adorable, little darlings underneath my bed,
Tatay instantly grabbed the box containing them and discard it amidst the
ricefield which was then chest high (dwarf me) almost submerging the whole of
me. Never did find them. Just a futile attempt in deem that no one will look
after them. I cared for them but not as much as Tatay cared for me.
I, too, had puppies. King and Jack. I loved
King the most, probably because he was so makulit always nibbling my toes and
gnawing my sock after school. I was chastised from feeding, bathing even
touching the puppies, but as persistent as I was ( I must have had ADHD,
Tehee!), I even hushed them to sleep at night.. in my bed! Father did find out
and poor King was filched on two legs, threw in an enormous strength and
smashed on the wall just near me. ;( I saw him squirmed before he grasped his last breath. (Rated SPG
here) I knew then it was my fault. I cared for that puppy but not as much as Tatay
cared for me. He cared for those puppies too. He played with them all the time.
But he chose to lose them rather than losing me. The pains of loving.
I came to know of loving as a one way
street. Just loving and giving and expecting nothing in return. To the extent
of self obliteration. Imagine how those pets almost snatch this very life in me,
i mean those fur. Haha! Or was I just suicidal? =))
The 5 kittens were constant reminder of
loving, losing and letting go.
And a dead puppy? Well, isn’t a romance ended tragically,
catchy? Shakespeare mode on! Haha! No, seriously. We have a propensity to be
cosset on so much with make believe fairy tale endings, happily ever after sort
of things. The truth is, they don’t exist. The easiest, most convenient getaway
from the world is the castle in Spain we build inside our cranium. The hardest
is to snap out of it.
But even so, the chaos in the absence of
love is tantamount to the shambles of its presence. In the end, we all choose
to be brave and bold...make a fool of ourselves and just FALL IN LOVE. And that’s
just about it. Period.
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